Ebay Members Say the Darned-est Things

This is the actual conversation thread we just had with an EBay member. I'm not smart enough to make this stuff up, prepare to be amazed....

HIM
Dear direct_used_tires,

i'll give ya 50 for the pair , p/u local
- srsrace71

ME

Dear srsrace71,

We do not end live auctions, after tires have run through the live auction twice they are moved to the store for 15% higher price (due to fees) after 30 days in the store then we start accepting offers.
Local pick up is however available for $5 each when a sell is finalized, which is waived if we install the tires ($12 each)
Thank you
- direct_used_tires

HIM

Dear direct_used_tires,

nice policy , hope i don't go into the business you'll be beat
- srsrace71

ME

Dear srsrace71,

excuse me? jump right in the water's fine. Your stellar feedback indicates that you'll do just fine.

Happy Holidays
- direct_used_tires

HIM

Dear direct_used_tires,

only a jackass would respond as such,, no i'll not dabble in the used tire sales , too many morons , i will however legislate the sale of second hand tires to be NOT LEGAL ,, thnx
- srsrace71

HIM (again before I saw the first one)

Dear direct_used_tires,

ok,
just got off the phone w/my good friend THE CONGRESSMAN ,the sale of used passenger car tires has been on the docket & will no longer be legal after 1/2014 ;it's over;just like leaded gas ,, you've got 3 years ,oh light truck 2015,, enjoy
- srsrace71

ME

Dear srsrace71,

Off your meds? Let me get this straight, we politely decline your offer then reply to your silly follow up email. Now YOU call a congressman and get used tires banned from the entire county? This is Great! Look for this conversation on the internet,, you may just be the next star wars dude!
- direct_used_tires

ME

Dear srsrace71,

while you’re at it can you get the IRS abolished and let us go with a flat national sales tax? I send you the tires for free if you get that done ol' great poo-baa
- direct_used_tires